A Welcome to All the New Readers due to the Andrew Sullivan Coverage

I want to say thank you to all the people who came to this blog looking for information as to the whereabouts of Andrew Sullivan (Those posts can be found here). This blog has remained in relative obscurity since its inception. In fact the only other times my hits have increased in a dramatic way were after I wrote a piece regarding Sanjaya Malakar's sexuality and again, last week, when I asked why Todd Palin's former business partner filed an emergency motion to have his divorce papers sealed.

This has been mostly my fault since I have another blog. Screaming is just for fun and I often forget it is even here. BITYMI is devoted to my passion, which is baking.

However, since this is election season and since politics are another passion of mine I will be on here more regularly. For those that have come back by for a second look, keep coming. I promise it will stay interesting.

Until next time,
Jon-Marc McDonald

Where's Andrew Sullivan? Apparently...

he's just fine, not being pressured to write or not write anything and he was spending the day with his husband soaking up the last days of summer. That's that.
Bull shit!

Sully never does this. Ever! I have been reading the blog since it started and not once has he pulled a MIA. That's not his style. And look, again, at what is not being said:

Thank you for your many emails of concern. For the record, I'm absolutely fine, nothing has changed with this blog, no one is pressuring me to write or not write anything, and I spent part of the day yesterday with my husband soaking up the last moments of summer together.

I spent part of the day with my husband? Right, because that "View from your window" post took up the other part. I don't buy it. And not addressing the speculation that he's got something on Palin. Hmmm. Something's rotten in Wasilla. I feel it in my bones

Where was Andrew Sullivan?

Where is Andrew Sullivan?

UPDATE III 1:30PM 2008-09-09 He's back. It's still all fishy. My response to his post about his whereabouts can be found by clicking here


Here are all three posts as to my speculation of Andrew Sullivan's whereabouts, from first to last, so you don't have to click from post to post.

Part 1 (Yesterday, 600PM):

Where is Andrew Sullivan today? His blog has received, just today, nearly half-a-million hits as of 5PM and he has only posted once, and that was a "View from your Window" post. So, where's Andrew Sullivan?
Hmmm


Part II (Yesterday, 800PM):

So just where is Andrew Sullivan? Last night, at 8:25, Andrew Sullivan posted something that, on its face, seems straight-forward and clear. The post simply applauds Sarah Palin's decision to raise Trig despite the fact that the Palin's knew of his Down Symdrome during the pregnancy. Take a look:

In thinking about this astonishing week, and what's to come, I want to go on record again as saying that the decision to bring up a child with Down Syndrome is one of the most noble, beautiful and admirable decisions any person can make. That Sarah Palin is doing that says a huge amount in favor of her. The love obviously being shown toward tiny Trig is also about as profound an advertisement for genuine, pro-life Christianity as you can have. It means that, in this respect, Palin has walked the walk of the pro-life movement - in ways that many others have not. In my view, and I mean this as passionately as I mean my criticisms of her public record, this really is God's work.

I have no reason to doubt that Sullivan feels this way. It is consistent with his beliefs about abortion. However read it again.

Now keep in mind that Sully is despised by both the left and right of the political spectrum. In many ways his positions are the loneliest to take because they are not often aligned along party lines or ideologies. I respect Sully for this approach (hence my regular citations of his blog on this blog). Now, once again, read what he wrote.

Did you catch any of it? What seemed perfectly clear at first glance becomes quite cryptic upon further observation. It seems to be foreshadowing something, telling his readers that something is about to break and when it does and chaos ensues, he wants people to know where he stands in regards to the innocent child, Trig, and the woman who is raising him as her own.

Let's pick the statement apart piece by piece. My commentary is in red:

In thinking about this astonishing week, and what's to come (what is to come? What information does Sully have that we do not? And why is he withholding it? Is he getting his ducks in a row on a potentially devastating story?), I want to go on record again as saying that the decision to bring up a child with Down Syndrome is one of the most noble, beautiful and admirable decisions any person can make (the "decision to bring up" Did you catch it? Bring up. Not "give birth to a child") . That Sarah Palin is doing that says a huge amount in favor of her. The love obviously being shown toward tiny Trig (not "her son". That's odd. Just the "love that is being shown toward Tiny Trig) is also about as profound an advertisement for genuine, pro-life Christianity as you can have. It means that, in this respect, Palin has walked the walk of the pro-life movement - in ways that many others have not. In my view, and I mean this as passionately as I mean my criticisms of her public record, this really is God's work. (Sully never once calls Trig Sarah's son)

Sully is not some unhinged blogger. He is someone that has built a respectable career on nuance and self-reflection. But reading his posts over the past week, one can't help but wonder if Sully has knowledge of something for which he is catiously seeking proof. If the information he has is not concerning the legitimacy of Sarah's relationship to Trig, I have no doubt it is something equally explosive. The question is, will he collect sufficent evidence to reveal the information, or will he, for the sake of his own reputation, be forced to keep the information to himself?
So, once again, where's Andrew Sullivan?

PART III (Today, this morning):
NOTE II: As many have pointed out, Sully has never broken a major story. I said that as well. It could be all this fuss is an illness and it could be that he getting the boot from The Atlantic. Who knows? I just suspect there is something more. I may be wrong. It would not be the first time!

My speculation as to whereabouts of Andrew Sullivan has once again brought a huge amount of attention to this blog. The hits last night and this morning alone are more than this blog normally receives in a four month period.

As of this morning Sully has yet to post. Many comments seem to think Sully could be ill or that something might be wrong with his husband or he might be on vacation. But Sully always, always leaves a post about this sort of thing and also gets people to guest-blog. Additionally, he just took a vacation and Sully would not miss the last few weeks of the presidential race for anything. He might be sick (or Aaron might be sick) but I doubt it.

Another comment asked if Sully has broken a major news story in his life. To my knowledge, no. His forte is commentary. But he has implored journalists to start asking the right questions about Palin and start doing their jobs. He has screamed (as loud as one can scream on a blog) that they not be intimidated by the McCain campaign and get to the business of thoroughly vetting Palin since McCain apparently did not .

Is he on to something? I don't know. But I do know he is not intimidated easily. He takes hits from all sides and keeps going strong.

Now, if he is on to something and does "break" a story be prepared for the war on Sully to intensify. His opponents will bring up the sex controversy of 2001 and use it as reason to discredit Sully's story. They will also say he is a hypocrite.

If they do, they do so at their own peril. I imagine Sully is prepared for whatever might come.

UPDATE: As many have pointed out, Sully has never broken a major story. I said that as well. It could be all this fuss is an illness and it could be that he getting the boot from The Atlantic. Who knows? I just suspect there is something more

IF YOU ARE LOOKING FOR JON-MARC MCDONALD'S BAKING BLOG, BakeItTilYouMakeIt.com click here

Continued Sully Watch: 2008

UPDATE III 1:30PM 2008-09-09 He's back. It's still all fishy. My response to his post about his whereabouts can be found by clicking here


NOTE: See my previous posts about this (1st)here and (2nd)here
NOTE II: As many have pointed out, Sully has never broken a major story. I said that as well. It could be all this fuss is an illness and it could be that he getting the boot from The Atlantic. Who knows? I just suspect there is something more. I may be wrong. It would not be the first time!

My speculation as to whereabouts of Andrew Sullivan has once again brought a huge amount of attention to this blog. The hits last night and this morning alone are more than this blog normally receives in a four month period.

As of this morning Sully has yet to post. Many comments seem to think Sully could be ill or that something might be wrong with his husband or he might be on vacation. But Sully always, always leaves a post about this sort of thing and also gets people to guest-blog. Additionally, he just took a vacation and Sully would not miss the last few weeks of the presidential race for anything. He might be sick (or Aaron might be sick) but I doubt it.

Another comment asked if Sully has broken a major news story in his life. To my knowledge, no. His forte is commentary. But he has implored journalists to start asking the right questions about Palin and start doing their jobs. He has screamed (as loud as one can scream on a blog) that they not be intimidated by the McCain campaign and get to the business of thoroughly vetting Palin since McCain apparently did not .

Is he on to something? I don't know. But I do know he is not intimidated easily. He takes hits from all sides and keeps going strong.

Now, if he is on to something and does "break" a story be prepared for the war on Sully to intensify. His opponents will bring up the sex controversy of 2001 and use it as reason to discredit Sully's story. They will also say he is a hypocrite.

If they do, they do so at their own peril. I imagine Sully is prepared for whatever might come.

UPDATE: As many have pointed out, Sully has never broken a major story. I said that as well. It could be all this fuss is an illness and it could be that he getting the boot from The Atlantic. Who knows? I just suspect there is something more

IF YOU ARE LOOKING FOR JON-MARC MCDONALD'S BAKING BLOG, BakeItTilYouMakeIt.com click here

Sully Watch: 2008

UPDATE 1:30PM 2008-09-09 He's back. It's still all fishy. My response to his post about his whereabouts can be found by clicking here

UPDATE 847AM 2008/09/09 NOTE: FIXED LINK Click here for another post about Sully's whereabouts

So just where is Andrew Sullivan? Last night, at 8:25, Andrew Sullivan posted something that, on its face, seems straight-forward and clear. The post simply applauds Sarah Palin's decision to raise Trig despite the fact that the Palin's knew of his Down Symdrome during the pregnancy. Take a look:

In thinking about this astonishing week, and what's to come, I want to go on record again as saying that the decision to bring up a child with Down Syndrome is one of the most noble, beautiful and admirable decisions any person can make. That Sarah Palin is doing that says a huge amount in favor of her. The love obviously being shown toward tiny Trig is also about as profound an advertisement for genuine, pro-life Christianity as you can have. It means that, in this respect, Palin has walked the walk of the pro-life movement - in ways that many others have not. In my view, and I mean this as passionately as I mean my criticisms of her public record, this really is God's work.

I have no reason to doubt that Sullivan feels this way. It is consistent with his beliefs about abortion. However read it again.

Now keep in mind that Sully is despised by both the left and right of the political spectrum. In many ways his positions are the loneliest to take because they are not often aligned along party lines or ideologies. I respect Sully for this approach (hence my regular citations of his blog on this blog). Now, once again, read what he wrote.

Did you catch any of it? What seemed perfectly clear at first glance becomes quite cryptic upon further observation. It seems to be foreshadowing something, telling his readers that something is about to break and when it does and chaos ensues, he wants people to know where he stands in regards to the innocent child, Trig, and the woman who is raising him as her own.

Let's pick the statement apart piece by piece. My commentary is in red:

In thinking about this astonishing week, and what's to come (what is to come? What information does Sully have that we do not? And why is he withholding it? Is he getting his ducks in a row on a potentially devastating story?), I want to go on record again as saying that the decision to bring up a child with Down Syndrome is one of the most noble, beautiful and admirable decisions any person can make (the "decision to bring up" Did you catch it? Bring up. Not "give birth to a child") . That Sarah Palin is doing that says a huge amount in favor of her. The love obviously being shown toward tiny Trig (not "her son". That's odd. Just the "love that is being shown toward Tiny Trig) is also about as profound an advertisement for genuine, pro-life Christianity as you can have. It means that, in this respect, Palin has walked the walk of the pro-life movement - in ways that many others have not. In my view, and I mean this as passionately as I mean my criticisms of her public record, this really is God's work. (Sully never once calls Trig Sarah's son)

Sully is not some unhinged blogger. He is someone that has built a respectable career on nuance and self-reflection. But reading his posts over the past week, one can't help but wonder if Sully has knowledge of something for which he is catiously seeking proof. If the information he has is not concerning the legitimacy of Sarah's relationship to Trig, I have no doubt it is something equally explosive. The question is, will he collect sufficent evidence to reveal the information, or will he, for the sake of his own reputation, be forced to keep the information to himself?
So, once again, where's Andrew Sullivan?

UPDATE 847AM 2008/09/09 Click here for another post about Sully's whereabouts

FOR JON-MARC MCDONALD'S BAKING BLOG, BakeItTilYouMakeIt.com, click here

Where's Andrew Sullivan?

UPDATE III 1:30PM 2008-09-09 He's back. It's still all fishy. My response to his post about his whereabouts can be found by clicking here

UPDATE: See my post here for more speculation as to where Andrew Sullivan might be?
UPDATE II 847AM 2008/09/09 Another post about Sully's whereabouts

Where is Andrew Sullivan today? His blog has received, just today, nearly half-a-million hits as of 5PM and he has only posted once, and that was a "View from your Window" post. So, where's Andrew Sullivan?
Hmmm
UPDATE: See my post here for more speculation as to where Andrew Sullivan might be?
UPDATE II 847AM 2008/09/09 Another post about Sully's whereabouts

Computer fried, once again

Well to those of you who found my blog yesterday (more hits yesterday than in the entire two year life of this blog) I say welcome.
However, my computer has finally given up and until I get a new one (which the way finances are right now might be by the time I'm 60) I am using my husband's. Therefore posting will be next to non-existent.
But entertain yourself at BakeItTilYouMakeIt.com . There are some fun recipes and videos over there.

Double Standards Much?

The only president he ever endorsed...

Let's keep in mind something. James Dobson, who would now "pull the lever" for McCain/Palin endorsed one man for president in his lifetime. That man is George W. Bush.

Dobson is the leader of the now "energized" base. You know the last time they were "energized"? Yep! It was when the shrub was their nominee.

Given Dobson's (and his followers) track record, it's safe to say this country best not take his advice again.

The saddest thing is, though, the voters have been fooled once before into voting for Bush (the first time doesn't count. He was not voted into office in 2000. He was ruled into office by activist judges) and the republicans are really, really good at fear and lies to win.

We'll see if it works this time

Palin Speech (I predict)

"Hello my fellow Americans!

Blah, blah, blah...John McCain...POW...

The press is out to get me...Break the glass ceiling...Hillary Clinton is a whiner, er, I mean winner...Lay off my family...I am qualified...I am a reformer...We will change Washington...All life is precious...Hey look, it's Bristol and Levi, the future Levi and Mrs. Levi...Protect Marriage...I luv Jesus...Jesus luvs me...9/11..."

And the bar has been set so terribly low (Bush was king at setting the bar low and stepping over it) that she will be seen as "hitting it out of the park". Really, at this point if she gets her name right the speech will be considered a success, the press will swoon and all those intrepid reporters will go back to carrying water for the McCain campaign.

Such is the sad state of the US of A

Keep Going

“If you hear the dogs, keep going. If you see the torches in the woods, keep going. If they're shouting after you, keep going. Don't ever stop. Keep going. If you want a taste of freedom, keep going…. We’re Americans and we don’t quit…we don’t have a moment to lose or a moment to spare”.
Hillary Clinton, quoting Harriet Tubman


"When McCain throws everything, including his seven kitchen sinks, at Obama next week, don't panic...keep going.
And when McCain reminds us, ad nauseum, that there was a time when he didn't have a kitchen sink (or a toilet or a bed or a pot to pee in or a super-rich sugar-momma), throw up a little in your mouth and...keep going."
Jon Marc McDonald

Bad Cake ? Huh?

Every once in a while I check my sitemeter. It gives me the locations of those visiting my blog and tells me how they get here. In the last 24 hours I have received dozens of visits from people searching the term " bad cakes " on Google. And the searchers are from all over the USA. Could someone please send me an email and let me know what that's all about? I would appreciate it.

bosie76nyc at msn dot com

We see his true colors shining through

Is James Dobson a flip-flopper, unprincipled or power hungry? Or is he a combination of all three. This is what James Dobson said just five months ago (emphasis mine):

“I am convinced Sen. McCain is not a conservative, and in fact, has gone out of his way to stick his thumb in the eyes of those who are. He has at times sounded more like a member of the other party. McCain actually considered leaving the GOP in 2001, and approached John Kerry about being Kerry’s running mate in 2004. McCain also said publicly that Hillary Clinton would make a good president. Given these and many other concerns, a spoonful of sugar does not make the medicine go down. I cannot, and I will not vote for Sen. John McCain, as a matter of conscience.

“But what a sad and melancholy decision this is for me and many other conservatives. Should John McCain capture the nomination as many assume, I believe this general election will offer the worst choices for president in my lifetime. I certainly can’t vote for Hillary Clinton or Barack Obama based on their virulently anti-family policy positions. If these are the nominees in November, I simply will not cast a ballot for president for the first time in my life. These decisions are my personal views and do not represent the organization with which I’m affiliated. They do reflect, however, my deeply held convictions about the institution of the family, about moral and spiritual beliefs, and about the welfare of our country.”

And today:
“I never thought I would hear myself saying this; While I am not endorsing Senator John McCain, the possibility is there that I might.”

To paraphrase John Kerry, he was against McCain, before he was for him.

Does anyone still take Dobson seriously? Sadly, I know the answer.

Jon-Marc McDonald has another blog...

If you are looking for Jon-Marc McDonald's baking blog, it can be found here











Jon Marc McDonald 's baking blog is here , Jon-Marc McDonald 's baking blog is here,

More tests. More fear. More faith. More prayer.

Spotting Love

The other day he fell. It wasn’t a terrible fall and in and of itself it would not have been a big deal. The problem is that the fall was not an isolated incident. Along with falling, his speech has been slow and mangled, his memory has been weak and his strength has been deteriorating rapidly. What does this all mean? We simply do not know.

Yesterday we went to see a neurological specialist on the Upper East Side. After a series of tests she said that he did, in fact, have a neurological disorder. To pinpoint exactly what it is will take a series of even more tests -- a MRI, a spinal something or other, extensive blood work, etc – and it could be a few weeks before they can diagnose him specifically.

Getting anywhere on the far east side of Manhattan is a bit of a hassle. We took the 4 to 59^th where we transferred to the 6 up to 68^th. At 68^th we walked east – all the way east – to York and 70^th. It would normally have been inconvenient but now that one of us has trouble walking, it was grueling.

Usually we walk at an extremely quick pace. We always have. New York is unforgiving to the slow. If you move to New York you accept certain unwritten rules, one of which is the requirement of a speedy gait. If you move slowly you pay the price.

Through the years when we have navigated the city together I usually walked a few steps ahead. And when I arrive at the destination I look back and he is just a few steps away. I never worried that he would fall…or stop…or forget where he was. That has now all changed.

Yesterday I made sure he walked ahead of me. My eyes never left his body. When he ascended stairs or an escalator I positioned myself just a few feet behind in case he lost his balance. If he were to fall, I was there to catch him. And if someone were to get aggravated by his slow pace I could step in so that they would be aggravated with me instead. I would be his strong arm when his became too weak, his legs when his quit working, his mind when his went blank.

On our way home, after we stepped off our last escalator, he leaned in and whispered “Thanks for spotting me, babe”. Up to that point I was unaware he noticed. In fact I did not want him to notice. I wanted him to feel as normal as possible and did not want him to perceive me as acting any way but normal.

And as we walked out of the station I began to cry. Thankfully my sunglasses were able to shield my tears from anyone noticing, especially him. But I began to cry because I am scared. I am scared out of my fucking mind. I have never been so scared about anything in my entire life. He has been through health scares before but nothing like this. And this is not the way it was supposed to play out.

The love that I have for him is something I cannot put into words. I never knew such a love ever existed. And if it did exist it certainly would never find me. But it did find me.

It found me on a Sunday afternoon in August of 2001. On that day I wandered into Hannah’s Lava Lounge in the Hell’s Kitchen area of Manhattan. They were playing BINGO and I thought it might be fun. However, when I sat down I noticed someone sitting a few feet away. He was cute, had an infectious laugh and he intrigued me. We began talking and we have been together ever since. Nearly seven years later, one day at a time, together.

I have had so many problems over the years, many of which I have put on blogs such as this. My issues, every single one, were issues he took as his own. If I was sick, he fed me. Dirty, he bathed me. Sad, he comforted me. Angry, he calmed me. He was always the rock, the foundation. The most charming of all the princes, the shiniest of all the knights.

He was the one that kept the red bucket by my side and washed it when it became full. He was the one that held me the night I sobbed over my grandfather’s death. He was the one that came to find me the night I was so drunk I did not know where I was and the one that made sure I had ginger-ale to drink when I was parched. He is the one that made me a bouquet of flowers out of paper napkins because we did not have the money for real flowers. He is the one that made me a cake to celebrate my anniversary of moving to New York. He is the one that left me a handwritten note on the kitchen counter every morning before he went to work. It always said I love you. I always knew.

But now I am the one. The one that makes sure I am never more than a few feet away when he is taking a shower in case he falls. The one that calms him when he can’t remember where he is. I am the one that makes sure he eats healthy food. I am the one that watches him while he sleeps to make sure he is still breathing and worries every time he coughs. The roles have changed, forcibly and by no decision of ours. The warrior is now the child. And the child, the reluctant warrior.

Today, like clockwork, the Mr. Softee ice-cream truck went by our building. Like a young boy, he perked up and said “I want an ice cream cone. Do you think I will be able to make it out there before he leaves?”

“I don’t know. Maybe…” Before I could finish my sentence he was out the door. Dressed in his slippers, pajama bottoms and a hoodie he went downstairs to find the ice-cream truck. I grabbed my camera and opened the window.

I wanted the picture. Not because I think he might be gone soon, though he might. Not because I don’t have enough pictures of him, though I don’t. Not because he looked so innocent and sweet, though he did. I took the picture because a day will come, no matter what comes of this, and I might forget.

I might forget just how adorable he looks in his pajama bottoms. I might forget that he loves ice cream. A lot. I might forget how cute he is when he eats from a cone and how cute our dog is watching him eat from the cone. No matter what, I don’t want to forget.

So tomorrow we go for the MRI. And as we go I will be just a few feet behind. I will make sure he doesn’t fall and that he gets to where he needs to be. I can’t promise I won’t cry. In fact I know I will. But through it all I’ll be spotting him. Because through it all he has always spotted me.

UPDATE: A continuing story on Ric's condition here

What's wrong with this picture?

(Photo by: Marcio Jose Sanchez-Pool/Getty Images.)

How you feel when you see this picture of two women -- together for 55 years and finally able to marry yesterday -- speaks volumes about your humanity.
Do you see love that can finally speak its name and two women who are no longer second class citizens in the eyes of their state? or...
Do you see two "sexual perverts" in an "alternate lifestyle" intent on "destroying marriage"?

Those that see the latter, what is it like to have such darkness in your heart, and to live amidst such darkness in the name of God?
Those that see the former, what you see is also what the future holds. And it is pure and good and so vibrant that darkness cannot reside there, no matter how hard it tries.

For Such a Time As This....

JON MARC MCDONALD'S baking blog can be found here.

Otherwise, keep reading

Andy does it again. Every single word!:

As a child, I had no idea what homosexuality was. I grew up in a traditional home--Catholic, conservative, middle class. Life was relatively simple: education, work, family. I was raised to aim high in life, even though my parents hadn't gone to college. But one thing was instilled in me. What mattered was not how far you went in life, how much money you earned, how big a name you made for yourself. What really mattered was family and the love you had for one another. The most important day of your life was not graduation from college or your first day at work or a raise or even your first house. The most important day of your life was when you got married. It was on that day that all your friends and all your family got together to celebrate the most important thing in life: your happiness--your ability to make a new home, to form a new but connected family, to find love that put everything else into perspective.

But as I grew older, I found that this was somehow not available to me.

I didn't feel the things for girls that my peers did. All the emotions and social rituals and bonding of teenage heterosexual life eluded me. I didn't know why. No one explained it. My emotional bonds to other boys were one-sided; each time I felt myself falling in love, they sensed it, pushed it away. I didn't and couldn't blame them. I got along fine with my buds in a nonemotional context, but something was awry, something not right. I came to know almost instinctively that I would never be a part of my family the way my siblings might one day be. The love I had inside me was unmentionable, anathema. I remember writing in my teenage journal one day, "I'm a professional human being. But what do I do in my private life?"

I never discussed my real life. I couldn't date girls and so immersed myself in schoolwork, the debate team, school plays, anything to give me an excuse not to confront reality. When I looked toward the years ahead, I couldn't see a future. There was just a void. Was I going to be alone my whole life? Would I ever have a most important day in my life? It seemed impossible, a negation, an undoing. To be a full part of my family, I had to somehow not be me. So, like many other gay teens, I withdrew, became neurotic, depressed, at times close to suicidal. I shut myself in my room with my books night after night while my peers developed the skills needed to form real relationships and loves. In wounded pride, I even voiced a rejection of family and marriage. It was the only way I could explain my isolation.

It took years for me to realize that I was gay, years more to tell others and more time yet to form any kind of stable emotional bond with another man. Because my sexuality had emerged in solitude--and without any link to the idea of an actual relationship--it was hard later to reconnect sex to love and self-esteem. It still is. But I persevered, each relationship slowly growing longer than the last, learning in my 20s and 30s what my straight friends had found out in their teens. But even then my parents and friends never asked the question they would have asked automatically if I were straight: So, when are you going to get married? When will we be able to celebrate it and affirm it and support it? In fact, no one--no one--has yet asked me that question.

When people talk about gay marriage, they miss the point. This isn't about gay marriage. It's about marriage. It's about family. It's about love. It isn't about religion. It's about civil marriage licenses. Churches can and should have the right to say no to marriage for gays in their congregations, just as Catholics say no to divorce, but divorce is still a civil option. These family values are not options for a happy and stable life. They are necessities. Putting gay relationships in some other category--civil unions, domestic partnerships, whatever--may alleviate real human needs, but by their very euphemism, by their very separateness, they actually build a wall between gay people and their families. They put back the barrier many of us have spent a lifetime trying to erase.

It's too late for me to undo my past. But I want above everything else to remember a young kid out there who may even be reading this now. I want to let him know that he doesn't have to choose between himself and his family anymore. I want him to know that his love has dignity, that he does indeed have a future as a full and equal part of the human race. Only marriage will do that. Only marriage can bring him home.

It's not perfect...

but come on over anyway and excuse the mess.

www.BakeItTilYouMakeIt.com

Happy one year, babe!

Today is our (Ric and me) one year wedding anniversary. I made a little video for him.